Sometimes I don’t think I’m mentally, physically or emotionally made for this.
There’s a pain in my soul I can’t control.
The tsunami of tears won’t release no matter how much the pressure builds.
My minds says you know better than to be shedding tears.
Heart says there’s a need for this cry to cleanse your spirit.
My body is like release some of this pressure, this pain.
Physically I’m fine emotionally I’m beaten. Spirit feels barely there.
I grin and bare it because I don’t know how else to wear it.
You got this baby girl there’s no quittin.
We got shit to do there’s no sittin.
You’re creating a mental space where there’s no room to live in.
Self doubt, stress, creator is creating a mess.
What do you do when your sickness is so deeply rooted you’re coming a loose at the seams?
You need to give up but that kills all the dreams.
They’re standing on my back because they can’t reach it yet.
I’m building for them for their enjoyment.
I barely holding it together for those smiles I need to be ok so they can flourish.
My sanity is shaken and stirred.
Oh but it’s well deserved I got down on my knees begged and prayed for this.
I said the wrong prayer and read the wrong bible verse for this to feel so rehearsed.
Be the help you don’t know someone needs because internally someone may be bleeding.
Self affliction is real whether mental, physically or emotionally the pain endured can only last so long.
Strong friends can only be so strong.
Caramel Xpressions is being xpressive today